This week, Chiamaka briefly touches on the phenomenon of sex and sexual energies.
Nigeria is largely a conservative nation; it’s no news. Most people hold dear to various traditional values and beliefs as though their life depended on it. However, regardless of how much we might like to sweep certain things under the rug or blatantly ignore them, they still exist or occur. For instance, no matter how much conservatives, religious people and other such factions may despise the fact, many people are having sex. While not everyone is engaging in sexual proclivities, nor does everyone have multiple partners, there is a fixation on the fact that engaging in ‘pre-marital’ sex is wrong and immoral. To present even more cause to dissuade people from engaging in sexual intercourse, spiritualists and other more conservative energy readers have said that when people have sex with each other, they exchange energies and other forms of spirits with each other. Unsurprisingly, these energies are negative in nature. There is no report on whether or not we may receive the positive traits of said person.
What I would like to know is, how does the body or your spirits tell when you are having premarital sex or multiple partners versus when you are having sexual intercourse with your long-term partner or husband. Also, what does this mean for people who are poly in nature and have multiple partners rather than a monogamous arrangement. On another note, why do people not gain the positive traits and mannerisms of their partners? If I have sex with someone who happens to be a genius, a generous person or loving does that make me even better than I am? And to quote the musing of someone from Twitter, after having sex with so many toxic men, “why did I not become a master manipulator, gas-lighter and liar myself?”
Personally, I do not believe that a person’s bodily makeup, soul or energy is irrevocably changed by the fact that they have had sex with another person, casual or otherwise. I believe that it is with due diligence to be more scrupulous about one’s sexual partners, however, people may still put up many fronts. And that is not the fault of the person engaging in sexual intercourse with them. Also, any energies that might be exchanged alongside bodily fluids are not indicative that there is something unfortunate or wrong about them. When you know who you are and you stand on that, another person’s sexual energy can never rewrite the course of your own destiny.
I believe that these such topics are a ploy to engage people in negative thinking about themselves or other people who may engage in casual sex. Rarely ever is this energy discussion initiated to people who are married or in serious relationships, even in cases where their partners may be extremely horrible to others. The discussion is also usually directed at women, as we are the ones constantly slut-shamed while men are socialized to engage freely in casual sex. It is important to interrogate the genesis of our beliefs or internalized thoughts before blindly taking them as gospel. People should not be demonized for attempting to exercise their sexual freedom.